No More Misunderstandings . . .

The gap between one who accomplishes more goals & one who doesn’t. Is the gap between how much you know & how much you actually apply.

The idea that knowledge is power is a myth. Knowledge applied is power. It is by applying what you know to solve problems for yourself and others that you make your contribution to the world.

How much further ahead would you be if you took action on what you want instead of talking yourself out of it?

It is a common habit to self sabotage by telling ourselves we can’t have the very things we want. In doing so we prioritize avoiding the pain of work or disappointment over the improved quality of life and happiness we’d experience if we just did the work to create what we want.

There are few positive uses of the word “Can’t.” Here are some of them. “I can’t please everyone.” “I can’t do it all.” “I can’t be too kind or too grateful.”

When you look into the stars you’ll see abundance. When you look into yourself you’ll see the same, as well as the means to express it.

I have yet to meet a person who couldn’t achieve their potential. I have, however, met plenty of people who had difficulty doing so until they learned the skills to do so.

We are defined less by our past and more so by our commitment to improve upon it.

If I had a dollar for every time I heard someone use their past as an excuse NOT to move forward in life, I’d be the wealthiest person alive. The truth is that your history is not your destiny. There is no power in this universe that commands you to repeat the past and refuse to learn from it. That choice will always be yours.

I’m a 21 year cancer survivor and an adult with Asperger’s. I have managed to push through these challenges through sheer force of will, with boundless determination and an optimism that has been acquired  from having experienced that seemingly hopeless situations can become better. With all of this there were struggles that remained, struggles that I had resigned myself to as part of my reality. These challenges began piling up on me in recent months and it was getting harder to function. While discussing these challenges with a colleague she asked me if I had ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder). I was taken aback by the suggestion as I had mistakenly assumed that all of my challenges were explained by the Asperger’s. As I researched ADD I read a list of challenges that precisely fit my experience.

For years I had been referring others to Psychiatrists and encouraging them to seek medicinal remedies to their challenges (if only in the short term) while quietly resisting the idea for myself. I had a stubborn pride that insisted that I was better for choosing to push through all my challenges no matter what the cost. The cost was becoming the energy to give to my family, my creative passions and a significant drain on my motivation to name a few. I had determined that I was burning out with what felt like a snowstorm in my mind. I had attributed this snowstorm experience to reality and didn’t fully appreciate just how significant a role my mind was playing in distorting that reality.

As I contemplated my resistance to meds all these years and the revelation that if ADD was in fact part of my neurological makeup, the potential for a simple medicinal solution was overwhelming in it’s positive implications. I sought a referral for a Psychiatrist and just last week met with him for the first time. I was fortunate in that he was very kind, respectful and patient as he asked me questions about my experiences with organization, memory, time management etc. At the end of our conversation he stated that of the nine criteria for ADD I met them all.

We discussed the various medicinal solutions available of which there are many. I decided to try Vyvanse as I’d heard good things about it from others, I’ve heard good things about other meds mind you but I wanted to start with this one. I had no idea what to expect as my only other experience with psychotropic meds have been antidepressants which I also found to be helpful.

The benefits I’ve experienced have been miraculous. When the Vyvanse is working I feel as if my brain is finally able to do what I need it to. My thinking is clearer, more organized and best of all it is so much calmer. I am well aware that many have tried similar medicinal remedies and claimed to have experienced no benefit and that is an unfortunate reality. But in my case I can say that my quality of life has greatly improved. I realized that the pride I felt from insisting I do it all without meds was costing me dearly and took action to change it.

Now that I know better I can humbly say that this is one more example of how critical it is to admit when force of will alone isn’t enough, and when I’m not acting with the tools I need to do the job the best I can. In this case, amazingly, a critical tool was a simple medication. My wife takes medication for migraines which helps her manage them and more able to solve the problems of her life. Now I have a similar tool which spares me the unnecessary struggle and mental exhaustion of forcing my mind to organize without help, even with my greatest effort it wasn’t enough.

When I finally realized I needed help I am grateful I put my pride aside and asked for that help. The results as I said have been miraculous. I can only hope that after reading this you look to the aspects of your life where pride may be standing in the way of you asking for the help you need. More importantly, what it is costing you by making pride more important than the life you could otherwise create by getting the help you need. Thanks for reading.

Efficiency and Productivity have less to do with how much time you have and more to do with how you use the time you have.

I meet so many people who claim to be overloaded, over scheduled, over committed etc. What I and they come to discover is that they have long to do lists that lack one common and powerful characteristic. Their lists are not prioritized. Without prioritization everything can appear urgent when in fact very few items on the list are. When my clients finally learn to list the items on their list according to the importance they truly deserve, it’s amazing how manageable life can become and so quickly.

A disability is not only a matter of ability but of opportunity. People in wheelchairs used to be held back because environmental barriers limited their opportunity NOT their ability. For those of us with neurological challenges, the barriers lie within the minds of others more than anything else.

Let’s also not forget the incredible barrier those with challenges place before themselves with the word “CAN’T.” A word either used to allow one a convenient excuse to be dependent upon others. An escape from the risk of being disappointed when things are difficult to accomplish. Or from the fear that when one actually succeeds you can never use that excuse again.